First day of school! (Not for me lol :|)
Had a good time hanging out at the Newark campus today. Got to see lots of familiar faces, chatted with Franz who I haven't seen since the time Timi and I were still trying to work things out. Spotted Bev. Walked someone who was late to her class :P Was supposed to have a lunch date with Darlene, who I didn't expect to see at the Newark campus but still ended up seeing her with Dorothy. Went to Chucky Cheese with them to pick something up, dropped Dorothy off, then off to BJ's! Three hours at BJ's spent gossiping with Darlene about summer's events (or lack of) while stuffing our faces with nachos, fries, pizza, and pizookie!! Off to Ohlone's main campus to walk Darlene up to her anatomy class. Saw many other familiar people but too lazy to stop and chat with them. Got a phone call from Kate and Barbs asking to meet up for movies with the group on Friday. Home.

I miss Ohlone. Like a lot a lot a lot. (And why are people only calling me now that school's started?)

-
Something's changing. Hmmm..

Say there's no future for us as a pair, and though I may know, I don't care...

I don't know why that line from a song is stuck in my head, but if applied to my life, I think it speaks out for me. I guess I'm prepared to get hurt, I was even from the start because since day one I knew my chances were very slim, yet there I was (and here I still am) hoping and doing what I can. I just don't want to look back in future and think that I could have done something but I didn't just because I was afraid to get hurt.

So yep, stubborn as it may sound, I don't care. I'd be here regardless.

Plays watched: 42nd Street, CATS, Jersey Boys, Lion King, Wicked!

Plays to watch: Wicked (hehe), Phantom of the Opera, Legally Blonde, Little Mermaid, Avenue Q, Billy Elliot. (plus many many more. i wanna live in Broadway!!!)

-
Maybe I'm brainless
Maybe I'm wise
But you've got me seeing
Through different eyes
Somehow I've fallen
Under your spell
And somehow I'm feeling
It's "up" that I fell - "Wicked" the musical

Please please please don't let it melt :|

omg im dating the bitch! but i have another plan :D

(supposedly stuck onto my passenger seat mirror so that I can act all cheesy and exclaim that you have dirt on your face just so you'd look in there and find it)

Maybe next time :) Get well soon, my special one.

Jenaaaaa I need a replacement date tonight, why aren't you here? :(

Dear God,

Please don't let the girl I love suffer. Please cure her of her colds and fever and bless her with good health. It hurts me to know that she's sick and feeling bad :( Please watch over her my dear God, please let her recover soon. Amen.

Who takes two consecutive taxi rides around the SUBURBS? Me apparently :)) Feels like Singapore days again when you're rushing to get somewhere and you've got no other means of doing so but to hail/call for a cab. Pretty cool experience though since my first driver was nice enough to offer to speed just to catch someone (unfortunately we lost her :|) and to ignore the meter on our trip back from where he picked me up from. Second driver was patient enough to tolerate my ever changing decisions of where to go. Was the whole experience worth it? TOTALLY :) I got to visit Ohlone and more impotantly, see somebody :)

(I know Jena, you're probably rolling your eyes at me and my all-of-a-sudden-life-is-pe

rfect-days, but i know you're just jealous! Either that or you and Tami are together reading my page through your stupid iPhone and gossiping about me. Tskkkk when are you going to cyberdate me again?!)

Hating my current situation.

Guess I have to re-plan all my plans and make them fit into my pathetic living arrangement.

Really don't understand why my 3 parents who i've only recently become close with, can understand me and trust me and know who I really am, when my mom who loves me the most, whose been with me the longest, can't do any of those three things. Her mindset is like fuck, to be honest, and maybe that's why she's living up to it. She thinks she's a bad mother (which I really really object to) but I guess that's what she's making herself to be. Just the thought of that is killing me. How can I live my life thinking that the person who has single-handedly raised me and stood up for me and provided for me all that she could, thinks that she's a horrible mother when she really isn't. And how can I live through it that she thinks that way because of the way I react towards her? All I want for her is to get to know me, to try and understand, but all she thinks about is me wanting to have my own way thus making her feel like she's a horrible mother. If she'd only stop worrying about what the world can do to her daughter, if she'd only stop trying to raise me like how she was raised, if only she'd get to know me for me.... maybe she'd see that I'm not such a bad person afterall, and that maybe she'd trust me a little bit more and stop worrying so much for me.

If only she knew how guilty I feel sometimes being able to talk to my dad,stepdad, stepmom, and not her....

I had a good time "running errands" :) I hope I made someone smile today, because I was smiling throughout the day.

And a new countdown begins... but this time there isn't any definite end date.

Bad day which ended good :)

She's finally back home and I was the first to see her! I decided to commute and hang around the airport early since I was bad mooding. Arrived at 6pm which meant I had a good two hour wait which wasn't a problem because I bought myself a book and I had my Ipod to keep me company :) 7:44PM her plane landed, 16 minutes early. She didn't know I was there so it was quite the surprise for her to see me smiling at her the moment she walked out of the gate. Met her ates for the first time and I feel so bad again because I lost my tongue (again). It was nice just knowing that she was by my side though :) I'm glad she's back.

Now can someone teach me how to not be shy? I think I'd rather be obnoxious than sit around acting like I'm mute. GRRRR.

"Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt, but it’s the only way to live life completely."
"Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk."

Understood :)

I see Taipei flags on my counter! :D I'm gonna miss seeing Philippine flags though :(
Someone's trying to make me sleep but I shall accompany her at her stopover (8hrs long) because that's what she did when I was in New York! She's pee-ing right now so I'm sneaking an entry just to share how cute she is (even though she's mean because she said she wouldn't text message me when she arrives because I refuse to go to sleep). Hahaha I bet she's done pee-ing, which means I'm done blogging! Weeeeeeeeee!


(hahaha i sound like a retarded kid)

"I guess her month long holiday is a good thing, gives me time to prepare myself and plan :"

It's been more than two months since she left and I hope that when she comes back tomorrow, I'll be ready. I just wish I don't lose my tongue again and start acting all shy :|

Excited much? :D

Heck yeah. Too excited for your return that I lost the ability to describe my excitement. I tried writing a poem, I stopped after the first line. I tried writing a normal entry but my words wouldn't coincide with the wave of excitement that's running through me. Even this entry sounds pathetic (please forgive me? :D) but I guess that's what happens when you're too excited right? It's ironic cause you're filled with inspiration to write, yet you're too caught up with it that the right words just get lost and you'd find yourself unable to paint an accurate picture of how you're feeling because no matter what you do or type, the words would never amount to all that you're feeling. Okay see, I told you I'm not making sense here. It's the excitement. Oh my God, saaaaaaaabaaaaaaaaw! (Guess who I learnt that expression from?) :))

Bad mooding because of school again.

Random: If i attended Davis for four years, I'd have spent enough, on just school fees and accomodation, to buy four new cars.

I miss having shaker fries at Mcdonalds :( Why the heck don't they have them here?!?!?!?! And KFC doesn't have my cheese fries and zinger burger. and LJS is so far away :( Its no wonder I've stopped relying on cheap fastfood to curb my hunger. Sigh.

So much for just having salad for dinner; totally spent 40bucks just on food -_-" Well we had Greek tonight, and I guess that 40 bucks pretty much covered for the belly-dancing show put on by a 50-or-so years old woman who jingles what sounds like cow bells and bursts into random screaming after doing her routine.

On the brighter side, I kept to my word of not drinking (okay, maybe I had a few sips...) and I wasn't being lazy which meant I drove from SJ to Fremont to Hayward to Livermore and back to Fremont. Considering that I never drive on the freeway and that I'm always lazy, that's a very good accomplishment. You deserve a pat on your back wuizzy!

So yayyy I got myself a bicycle (why the heck are those things so expensive?!) and I finally showed up for dentist appointments lol. The cute assistant is still there, and she's still asking me why I have such a small mouth. My brother went one step up and asked her how old she was though, 22. Hmm mehhh.

Anyways! I'm off for some outdoor dining and entertainment. I have to promise myself only to eat salad since I'm bloody fat (and near broke). Salad, with minimal dressing. Yesssss. And no drinking.

Busy day :|

- Go bicycle shopping
- Dentist appointment (My dentist is scary :| but I'm hoping her cute assistant hasn't changed)
- Dinner/Chillout session at Santana Row, and ComedySportz downtown for improvised acting at 9pm (and I'm their designated driver since all of them wants to drink :| Goodluck!)

People say "out of sight, out of mind" but how can that possibly be true? You've been gone for so long, but never have you left my mind.

Someone's kinda drunk tonight and it was so cute listening to her talk on the phone! :D

My housemate just emailed me and I got her on facebook now. She's straight, but at least I know she's gay friendly (I searched her whole profile for clues and thank God she's in a group that supports Marriage Equality in California! Oh, and she's a softball player which is like the second lesbian sport next to rugby). I just hope we get along well (enough to survive the school year) though. I don't want to start becoming a bitch (again).

Frisco made me feel better :)
I walked around dropping coins into the hobos' cups! It wasn't my usual "go to San Francisco and burn a whole in my pocket because of clothes shopping" day; didn't do any of that since I'm saving up (also because I didn't have my debit card with me) but I still ended up spending 250 :| I got to see a few places I don't normally go to though. Plus I had a good chat with a young lady along the way about marriage equality and stuff like that. I wanted to sit around some random cafe and just watch people walking by and maybe chat with other random people, but I was feeling happy enough so I left. It was nice walking around the city, blending into the crowd and trying to keep up with the pace of how people walked.

There's something about the city that's so therapeutic; I don't care if I'm alone, it always seems to make me feel better.

-
6 days! :)
Someone's coming home!

Ultra bad day. I feel like bursting out in a series of chinese expletives at anyone who dares talk to me at home. I seriously don't want to move to Davis and live with anyone else. And mom's being anal about my housing fees which isn't even supposed to be my problem. I knew Davis was a bad idea from the start.

I should just pop in some sleeping pills and sleep. Tomorrow will be a better day, I'm spending it in the city. Alone.

Now I really don't want to go to Davis :(
Got my housing assignment and found out that I have a housemate. I can't imagine having to put up living with myself, what more, a housemate who I know nothing about and who may even turn out homophobic! Fuuuuuuck. Major bad vibes. She's white, what if I try cooking some smelly filipino food in the kitchen?!?!?! Oh my God. And I just read reviews of the apartment complex I got assigned to, I heard the walls were paper thin! How the heck am I going to blast my music as and when I like?! Or what if SHE blasts her music and I happen to hate the music she's listening to? Omg what if she has a boyfriend who she invites over and I'd be able to hear everything from my side of the house?! Oh shoooot I'm thinking of the million and one things that can go wrong in that one year stay of mine. I feel like cancelling my reservation but I'm only going to be wasting the 500 bucks that I put down to it already, and I doubt I can find another apartment somewhere in Davis where I can be alone. How now? Shit shit shit......

I really have to start learning my lesson and stop being immature. That's strike three for me thanks to my insensitivity. But if i could just learn to know when to be serious and when to stop joking around, maybe I can still save myself. I can't afford to lose you because of my insensitivity, I'll never forgive myself for that. Not you, not now, and not ever.

(I'm getting hooked onto your favorite song which you told me you hated)
((I was right when I said you secretly like it))

-
Jena, next year you're coming over regardless of anything okay! Stop spending your money on movies and town (and whatever you spend your money on), and i'll stop spending on food! We're going to make our plan happen this time, and Tami's going to have to come along (because the UK just wouldn't be as worth it compared to coming here and spending time with me and you!) because she's going to regret it her whole life if she doesn't!

If I am capable of hurting you even now that we're not together, then maybe I shouldn't want to get together with you. Because I don't want to hurt you. Not now, and especially not then if we ever get together. I know what it feels like to get hurt, and I think I'd rather be the one being hurt instead of living with the thoughts of having hurt you.

For all the insensitive things that I've said, the times where I laughed at the wrong thing and made the wrong jokes, for making you feel anything but happy - I'm sorry.

Boy am I glad to be back from camping!

Although it wasn't the regular three day two night camping trips we've always gone to (and which I also always enjoyed) I'm more than happy that it was only an overnight trip this time. Not that the place wasn't beautiful, or relaxing, or fun; I just couldn't deal with the fact that there was no phone reception no matter where I stood.

When we first got to the campsite, it was still good. I was keeping up to my promise of having fun by going boating, swimming (a.k.a floating in the lake with a life jacket on), and eating (nonstop). I even got caught lying under a tree daydreaming with a huge smile on my face. I was in a middle of conjuring happy thoughts of you in my mind when I heard giggling from my two siblings. I opened my eyes only to see them looking down at me and giggling because they claimed I suddenly started smiling while my eyes were closed. Majorly embarrassing but those kids made me so conscious I couldn't close my eyes to go on with my thoughts; my sister even tried holding a camera over my face the moment I closed my eyes again just so she could snap a shot in case she got lucky and caught me smiling all over again. I eventually fell asleep for two hours under that tree...

Evening came and it got so very lonely. I went cycling alone with just my ipod and my phone, wanting to get away from everyone, and still being hopeful I'd find signal somewhere along the way. My (lack of) luck with signal, combined with how the wind blew at my face while my bike increased speed going downhill as the sky grew dark got me. It was hardly 8pm then and I was THAT lonely; I wanted to go home there and then. It's ironic how all my past camping trips were problemless and happy through out because I had problems with people back home, camp was like a getaway from all the heartbreak and drama, and it always worked to the extent that I didn't want to go home. But there I was last night, not a problem in the world, happy with my life, feeling utterly depressed. I saw a payphone booth while cycling back -I thought I could call you with that - I guess that was the only thing that kept my optimism up. I rushed back to the campsite asking everyone for coins (clever me decided that since we were going to be in the middle of nowhere with just trees and dust, I didn't need my wallet ((which is always filled with coins))) only to have them tell me that no one had coins. I still went ahead and dug mom's purse though, I guess I was lucky to find 95 cents.

I cycled back to the phone booth after dinner and realized that 50 cents only gave me three minutes talktime since it wasn't local enough (local calls were 50 cents for 15 minutes, but by local they meant that it had to have the same area code which was 411, yours was 408). I can't ever remember the last time I used a payphone (probably grade school) but there I was pressing buttons on that big silver telephone inside a booth, nervous that it would be someone else picking up the phone and I'd have to debate with myself what name to call you (I settled with your full first name) and what name to give if they asked me for my name (I settled with Marie cuz they'd know who Louise was). My first try didn't get through and I still got my money back. The second and third try got a ringtone but nobody picked up my call. My fourth and last try, the damned payphone ate my money. I wanted to try again, but I only had 45 cents left :( I walked back to campsite in the dark (with a lamp that I didn't bother turning on) feeling defeated. I ended up lying inside my tent at 9.30pm with my ipod stuck to my ears just hoping I'd fall asleep fast and wake up in the morning so that I could get home. It worked (for awhile) cuz I fell asleep even before 10pm, but I was awoken by my alarm clock at midnight because it was my sister's birthday and I wanted to greet her. It was freezing after and I crawled back into my sleeping bag and thought of how nice it would be to have someone beside me to snuggle up with while having at 10 layers of blankets over us. At least I fell asleep again not feeling so horrible this time.

Oh, we had smores after dinner. The kids (and I) sat by the fire burning marshmallows, but I made myself two perfect smores (no burnt marshmallows) and ate it. I only really wanted one cuz it was too sweet, but I ate two anyways. The other was meant for you, because I was hoping it was you I was there with instead and you mentioned that smores were yummy.

The morning after was pretty uneventful. Breakfast, and packing. Ugh. Although we had plans to go kayaking, I'm glad it got cancelled. All I really wanted was to be home, back in bed with my laptop beside me, and signal on my phone. We left the site soon after, I had my phone in my lap the whole time so that I'd be aware the moment I got phone signal back. 10 minutes into the drive out of the wilderness and there was my phone with two messages that brought a smile back to my face and that stayed till I got home :)

If you thought it was impossible to miss someone who isn't together with you (not a break up okay) so badly, you're so wrong.

Camping tomorrow.
Definitely going to be the first time i'll be missing my laptop and cellphone's signal. I used to love camping a lot just so I could escape all sorts of technology and temporarily disconnect myself from all my friends, but this time I'm feeling uneasy. I'm crossing my fingers that the campsite would at least have phone reception, that'll be enough to make me a very happy camper.

Then again, I'd have uninterrupted daydreaming-of-you sessions if my phone decides to be a useless piece of plastic :) I'm going to miss you sooooo much!


(okay, maybe i'll do a bit of kayaking. I miss Outward Bound days :|)

Devoid of any form of technology from tomorrow till Monday :|

Major food coma :(

The group called me out on a last minute dinner/joyride and we had ribs,ribs, and ohmygod sinful ribs for dinner. Fuck, so much for not spending on food anymore, my lost debit card's not helping at all. After, we were driving in the dark at this deserted road in Livermore (wanted to totally switch off the headlights but the car was on automatic headlights) telling ghost stories and scaring the shit out of each other. We had to walk our friend all the way back to her doorstep and hand her over to her mom because she was too scared to be alone after.



dear you, i miss you.

Lost ATM card. Guess that's gonna help prevent me from spending in the coming week or so because I won't have it around to use for my convenience :)

Caught The Time Traveller's Wife with my sister. Nice movie, not very dramatic or moving for myself though. I was expecting to cry even just for awhile but I didn't even get anywhere near to doing so. Either the movie wasn't really that sad, or I'm really happier these days thus the increased resistance to crying over sad movies. Hmm.. The two kids and the lead actress were really pretty though!

I'm supposed to be touring Kim Choo and her friend around the city this month but her vacation apparently clashes with my sister's birthday and now I'm having a headache trying to set time aside to meet her :(

I opened my big box of memories again. I'm missing everyone all over again. I can't believe high school was so happening, that my grade school classmates still wrote me letters when i was already in the middle of high school. Even my pathetic six months in the nursing course was so rich in memories. And my (almost) three years here? All in a blur.

But omg, who is Wang Yi from 1EB (not even sure which batch of juniors she's from)? I have a random letter from her and someone else (whose signature I cannot read). I have letters from them yet I can't remember who they are. And I know I have letters from my "fan club" (they dubbed themselves that not me!) but I can't find them anywhere :(

I miss my fucked up high school. Even if everyone hated me for being Discipline Head, I'd be willing to relive all those days again.

And Jena, crap your notebook cracked me up all over again. Thanks for those wonderful memories gurl. Can you tell me why you used to call me "Jill" though?? I still don't get it!

I never thought I'd get all that money I spent on hospital bills refunded :) Now I've got extra spending money!

In other news, I only get a twin-sized bed for college. I'm gonna miss having extra space to roll around in (and complaining that my bed's too big for just one person). 36 more days before I move.
-

Today marks two months knowing you but it feels like I've known you longer than that. I can't believe we've been speaking for two months straight now. I hope this goes on and on and never has to stop. Again, I'm so very glad that I met you.

I MISS YOU.

I was out counting meteors tonight. Camped out in my backyard all bundled up in my sleeping bag from midnight to 3am. I counted a total of thirteen meteors (some were meteorites) which makes seven for you and six for me :)

The occasion would have been perfect if you were beside me, but hey, there's always next year!

Someone's package got tired of traveling and finally decided to arrive in Manila! :D

Daddy shaved his head, I want to do so too!

I didn't realize I misplaced my phone for the whole day till I started wondering why my alarm clocks weren't going off. Guess where I found that damn thing? On the grass in my backyard. Don't ask me how it got there lol.

My (real) dad's gonna attend bartending school! So cute, I think he's too bored with his life.

Things to save up for:

- LA Trip with YOU (and maybe friends) so that I can experience you scream my eardrums to death on the roller coasters. (Take note: buy earplugs!)
- Seattle Trip with the group.
- Caribbean Cruise for next December.
- Asia Trip (Philippines, Singapore, Thailand, Bali in Indonesia, and Hong Kong).

Good luck Louise!

I just shared a moment with my two siblings here. All three of us were working out in the backyard when my sad song playlist suddenly started playing and we ended up just lying on the ground staring up at the stars for a good thirty minutes talking about life, love, and everything else that mattered. Picture me, a twenty year old, telling my soon-to-be fifteen year old sister and my thirteen year old brother about my greatest fears and the scenarios i come up with about love and relationships, and how scared I am of falling into such fates one day in the future. They barely know anything about all that, yet they accomodate me so well and make me feel so safe. My brother shared about how he's still in love with his ex from 6th grade; my sister, her fears about school. And there I was thinking of how recent we've become this close to one another, not even half a year since we started bonding like this. I almost cried (thanks to the dark, and the sad songs) when I remembered the thought of my brother hugging me so tightly and telling me everything was going to be alright, that day Timi left my house for the last time and I was sobbing so hard. He held me so tight whispering reassuring words in my ear while I ignored him and bawled my eyes out. I almost forgot that he was five years younger than me back then.

I'll miss them when I leave :(
It's drawing nearer. Here I go moving again, just like how I've been doing all my life. No doubt it's going to be a challenge, but I'm going to strengthen my ties with my family and the people I love back here around Fremont (and you from Hayward :D) and make sure that nothing changes. If any, it'd be for the better.

I wag googling myself last night and I found some pretty neat memories hidden around the web. I saw someone else's old blog which prompted me to go back to my very first blog and I had a good laugh at myself for the stupid things I used to blog about and the stupid way I used to blog. Singlish? Hahaha.

Here's one for you Jena!

"and before recess, cyn jena and i took so long at the ladies and when we came out i spotted aminah on her way up the stairs to class.. maan..
the 3 of us became mad ladies and dashed past the 3rd story from one end to the other.
and jena didn't even noe y she was running?! lol!!!
and even when we reached class, aminah jz reached the 3rd flr landing?? *smacks head* oh gawd... "

Aminah = Teletubbies! (the ugliest one) HAHAHAHA.

Good ol' days. I can't believe that whole blog of mine got printed out by my Math teacher who happened to be the head in counselling (or something like that). I even wrote about how she had sweaty armpits while writing on the whiteboard. You can imagine the shock I got seeing a whole stack of papers with my personalized blog background in it and my rantings; I couldn't go wrong, that couldn't have come from anywhere else but me :| Plus I just realized it had pretty X-rated details in there about a particular ex and I. Ha! One for the memories!

-
I'm so lazy to go out! And I miss that girl in Manila who's asleep now.

Tequila Bar at Santana Row for some Mexican lunch tomorrow! Thank God for the change, so sick of pasta and anything Italian. Oh shit, I need to stop eating. Someone called me fat today and it's depressing.

Six more weeks to Davis. So looking forward to it, NOT.

Pissed off with Fedex. Grrr.

I found pictures of someone when she was waaaay young! Hahaha I'm supposed to be sleeping :|

Anyway Vane, since you're jealous that I'm writing about "other girls" (its supposed to be singular by the way!) I shall mention you so that you won't get jealous anymore. Awwww I'm damn sweet right? Hahaha I miss you woman, you're in Perth having the time of your life and enjoying your new found freedom. Do take care and study hard and do your parents proud okay? And teach me your sexy British accent sometime! Tsk, I thought you moved over to my side... Now I see you with a BOY. So much for being gay vaneeee! There, I wrote a whole paragraph about you! Lovelovelove (send my love to Sam too!). Hahaha get Bedah to join you all too, I think she's busy trying to hook up with lawyer girls :|

And you, it may be too soon coming from me, but I know that what I'm feeling for you isn't just some transient feeling that would just disappear when I wake up one random day. It isn't the temporary crush I get on random people that would only be replaced when another comes along. It isn't anywhere near that, the depth of what I feel for you surpasses all of those shallow feelings; it's real, very real. I've thought about the strangeness of how this could possibly be happening to me; how it was possible that I've fallen in love with someone I've mostly been talking to online; I've thought of how very shallow and desperate that might sound, but at the end of it, I still can't dismiss the fact that it happened and here I am still feeling the same way about you. You're so far away from me, you don't do anything, yet you fill me up with so much happiness and contentment. You know, I'm serious about you. And I'm serious when I said I'd wait for you. I'd be a fool to just let someone like you go, I'm pretty sure if I did, I'd never find anyone like you again. So here I'll stay, trying to be the better person that would hopefully be the best for you one day.

You're so smart hun, you actually figured it out :) But now there's no surprise, no thanks to my big mouth. It's okay though, that's only the first of many to come!

I wish I was there to take care of you and nurse you back to normal though. It's been almost a week now since you've been sick :( Get well soon hun.

Need to start being productive. I've a deadline of 8pm tomorrow night to beat.

Hehehe still can't figure out what I'm gonna send you huh? Cmon, my clues are so easy. But ohwell, Monday the 10th isn't long from now :) I hope you like it.

It's mom's birthday and I feel tension at the dining table :( Poor mom.

Oh shoooot. UC Davis freaking cancelled one of my classes (no thanks to the stupid California budget cuts)and now I'm only left with 2. I feel another semester being added onto my stay at Davis. Who's up for another protest at the Capital?

I have a pretty long list of things I'm supposed to be depressed about and here's just a few:

- Gaining 10 pounds over the past 3 weeks.
- The fact that my country's postal service is fucked up and Fedex charges 50 bucks per pound excluding the extra charge on custom's value.
- Stepdad being home from now on because he just got laid off :|
- Having around a thousand more pictures to upload for people on Facebook and really feeling lazy to do so (Get rid of your camera already Louise...)

-
I wish I was still in Santa Barbara, I don't mind being alone. I'd sit by a street corner cafe/restaurant drinking beer/wine all day just watching people go by and chatting up whomever is up for a random conversation. Ahhh, time to plan our next trip - Seattle! Hopefully by Thanksgiving or after Christmas :)

There's a lot of movies I want to watch. 500 Days of Summer, The Time Traveller's Wife, Harry Potter 3D (lol yes i haven't watched the damn movie), Funny People, Julia and Julia, etc. But I've no one to watch them with. I smell a Movie Marathon with myself and popcorn :|

July 28 2009 - “You never let me down.”

Yesterday I did. I let my emotions get the better of me.

Perfect for some Norah Jones and other songs like that.

Here's to another one for my drafts.

Say I'm drunk, say i don't know what I'm typing
But I can't go wrong, I sure do know who I'm loving.

Everyone's asleep. You're mad at me. And i'm here alone trying to finish my vodka. Cheers to you pretty Santa Barbara!

Wish it was me instead :(

Oh well, that's what all the alcohol's for!

I have alot of things to do when I get back. Boyyyyy am I excited :)
For now, I've to pack (again). Santa Barbara with the friends this time!